Army of Dog

We’ve known for a long time that Britain is headed down the path to a pure socialist state under the intrepid guidance of NuLabour. Now Gordon Brown is telling us that it’s imperative that we all go with them.

BOSTON (AP) - British Prime Minister Gordon Brown, in his first foreign policy address in the United States, called Friday on the U.S. and Europe to lead a new era of global “interdependence” aimed at solving international problems such as terrorism, poverty and climate change.”We urgently need to step out of the mindset of competing interests and instead find our common interests, and we must summon up the best instincts and efforts of humanity in a cooperative effort to build new international rules and institutions for the new global era,” Brown said to about 350 invited guests at the John F. Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum.

Rough translation: “If you Yanks would just stop clinging to your silly ’sovereignty’ and go along with our schemes, this would all be a lot easier.” Allow me to be the first to tell you to pack that shit up and take it back to the “mother country.” Most of humanity is awash in levels of poverty and overt corruption that America has spent vast amounts of her blood, toil, and treasure eliminating within her borders. And, by and large, we have been very successful.

We’re always willing to extend help to those who need it, and you would have a very difficult time finding a better ally when it counts. What we will not do, at least what I won’t do, is follow you down the rabbit hole of socialist utopian fantasies. America has helped countless other countries pull themselves out of the mire of poverty and dysfunction without the guidance of a gaggle of corrupt UN overseers. We don’t need your help to do the right thing, we’ve been doing it for more than two centuries better and faster than any international clusterfuck of self-aggrandizing bureaucrats ever could.

Here’s an idea Mister Prime Minister, why don’t you start hitting up the Chinese for massive amounts of money. They seem to be quite proud of their newfound economic prosperity, so let them start paying for shit like the big boys.  Sending money and weapons to the Janjawid for slaughtering Sudanese women and children doesn’t count as “foreign aid,” by the way.  And while we’re on the topic, where’s the demand that they cripple their economy by adopting your ridiculous “binding targets” for greenhouse gas emissions? The Chinese would tell you and your merry band of internationalist nannies to go fuck yourselves, and I heartily suggest that we follow their lead.